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Old Writing from before Bloodflow stole Sentience - back when aaa was happy

aandidari, May 19, 12 2:56 PM.

Aaandidark (Part I) – How I Got Here

I played a druid in Everquest. When I move to Everquest II, I really liked how much easier it was to form groups. My first toon was Aandidarii, a fury. One day early on, as a level 6, I was trying to kill Fippy Darkpaw by the North Qeynos gates when I was invited to join Silver Faith by the lovely and generous leader of a 6 member guild. Over the years I help build Silver Faith but never joined in raiding activities. Our bountiful leader had to step down due to real life demands, and the new leadership decided that in order to be an efficient raiding guild, all the non-raiders would have to leave the guild. I was, at that point, the senior member of the guild and instrumental in earning the status that got us to that point. None-the-less, I was told that if I did not leave I would be kicked out.

I wandered around un-guilded for a while and then joined the largest guild with the best website that was recruiting at that time, Circle of the Greater Wyrm. I was eventually drawn into raiding, because my class was needed. I was then subject to the typical public humiliation that raiding guilds indulge in. Eventually, the highest end members of the guild left to form a smaller raiding guild, taking all the “good” players with them. It was hard times at Circle. I actually attempted to step up to a leadership position, attempting to create a more collaborative leadership model. While several folks loved my ideas, a couple of members were extremely hostile to me personally; they perhaps perceived a power-grab. Dunno, but wow were they ever mean to me. So I left Circle wondering how guilds could be run that were not mean to people who are just trying their best. During this time I also rolled an illusionist, a conjy, and the necro, all with names based on my original EQ2 toon, Aandidari.

Divinity took me in. I served on Raid Force 2, where I was able to examine how elitism works in guilds. I was offended by gross vulgarity about women on a regular basis. I talked to the raid leader but he told me it was “just a joke.” I was bored so I started tailoring. Then Kleopatra offered to sell me her level 30 guild for 300 plat. I bought a guild hall and moved my swamp room there. On the twentieth of every month I got more fairy circle items, cat tails, frogs, and what not for the swamp room. It was my refuge and no one else was a member.

A very good friend of mine, known here as Tank X, introduced me to Saev, leader of Nightmasks (NM). Tank X had built a dirge for Saev and was active in their raid force on that toon. Saev recruited me for a long time, eventually changing the raid attendance rules so that I could miss one night a week of raiding. As a graduate student I have classes in the evenings; the days change each quarter. I raided with them for months and never saw any loot that would be an upgrade, amassing a lot of DKP and a perfect attendance record, for me. I did not understand that by the attendance standards, I was at the bottom line of performance.

Then the most recent expansion came out. I immediately had to miss two raids due to family emergencies. At that time, the NM leadership decided to toss out all the previous attendance records. Therefore I did not qualify to loot on anything, and would not be able to for several weeks until my two missing days disappeared due to rounding. And of course every mob dropped items that I deeply desired. I got no loot and became very disgruntled about the mathematics, which I understood very well were rigged, however unintentionally, against me. If I ever missed a raid, I would be unable to loot for weeks. So I complained. At first I complained directly to Saev, who was unimpressed. He told me that I would be able to loot again in a few weeks, if I just kept coming to raid. So I complained to my friends, one of whom was a very sweet person, the raid tank. Little did I know (what a dope) was that he was also a guild leader.

Soon the day of confrontation arrived. Right before the raid, Saev had given me some very nice resist rings. I was back into a good mood, finally, after having vented my frustration to my friends (or so I thought) and being rewarded with valuable rings. I was ready to be patient with Saev’s plan. But after raid that night, Saev told me to leave the guild or he would kick me out. My mind was blown. When I asked why, he said it was my fault that the raid tank had stopped being an officer. That was when I learned that he WAS an officer, which made me feel bad since I must have sounded like I was asking for favors. Sigh.

So Saev kicked me out, that dark and stormy night, and Tempting Fate took me in, offering me a place to hang my hat while I recovered. I will never forget their kindness. Tank X took his dirge out of NM shortly thereafter and made the rounds of all the high end raiding guilds on the server, eventually moving with many other of the elites to Blackburrow server, where he amassed huge amounts of loot to gear up not only the dirge, but also the tank. Sadly, he became hardcore and lost all his previous charm. His tale is a cautionary one – yes hardcore raiding corrupts.

Meanwhile, I shopped around and joined another raiding guild; known as the guild whose name we do not mention (TGWNWDNM). I will save that story for another day.

Aaandidark (Part I) – Another Day in the Saga

Life was good in TGWNWDNM. The guild leader was funny and friendly. The raid force was strong and we got past Sarah, clearing Tox Mound in less than five minutes one time. We killed the first two names in Palace. We were moving up. Unfortunately, the strongest players in the guild had other ideas. They seemed exclusive and elitist to me, but I had seen that so much before that I figured it was unavoidable. One day they showed up to raid and said we could not go to Labs because they had blown their lock-out timers six-manning the first two mobs. They defended their actions based on the “casual” nature of the guild. Some angry people left the guild immediately. Soon the elites took their toons over to Blackburrow, after having recruited from within the guild all the “good” players who would come with them.

The raid force was decimated but those of us who remained felt that we were probably better off without them and we kept raiding, at a lower level, while we rebuilt. Sadly, our leader, once cheerful and funny, got in a bad mood and stayed there for months. One member, who had decided that I was an elitist, took to making public attacks against me, including written text on the guild website. While I was forming groups, bringing in new people, helping people get marks and the loot the drops in the marks zones, always advertising in guild chat  - “send me tell if you want to join a group going to . . . .”, she was bad mouthing me saying I was exclusive. She never actually grouped with me. My attempts to make amends to her only seem to make matters worse.

Then the sun rose. Bloodflow joined TGWNWDNM, putting in his application that I was the reason that he had come aboard. We formed many groups, helping guild mates and others get marks, plat, and the equipment they needed to raid. We coached them on strategies. This kind of hard work often goes unrewarded, but in this case, it seemed to threaten the leader.

Bloodflow was often attacked by the leader in public and behind his back. I could never figure out why that happened. One of the guild leaders told me it was because she likes guardians the best. Who knows? But it was a harsh world for folks who are just trying to have some fun, help folks, and forget about RL for a few hours.

One night, after a particularly insulting session where BF was called into private chat with the guild leaders and berated because he did not want to bid DKP on an item (really!?!), I was in a group with him and a recently departed guild leader – she had quit TGWNWDNM because she could not continue in the hostile environment – and I invited them both to become leaders of my baby guild. I just wanted to cheer them up. I told them they could just do whatever they wanted. This is not the kind of chaos that appeals to everyone and she eventually stepped down to be a member. Bloodflow and I seem to thrive in our special chaos of arguing logically and passionately about what is the best way to run a guild, which at that time had 4 people in it. It was all very hypothetical, based on our reactions to the ongoing nightmare that was TGWNWDNM. I continued to build the swamp room and BF put up cloudy ceiling tiles using code.

But the refuge of that little guild was not enough to mitigate the unpleasantness in TGWNWDNM. It was a happy day when I left TGWNWDNM and moved my toon to my own guild. It took a month for BF to make the move. From that point forward, we have worked to build Sentience as a guild that respects its members and offers opportunities for growth as characters in a game and as real human beings. Our raid alliance has allowed us the chance to move from PR to VP to Icy Keep to Labs and Tox. Bringing Andromada into a leadership position has been a wonderful development. We have added a lot of members lately and each one seems to be a new opportunity for more fun.

The sun shines on Sentience.

BLOODFLOW steals Sentience!

aandidarii, Feb 26, 11 1:34 PM.

Are we community of cooperation?

Do we help others find success and enjoy their time in the game?

Do we play well with others?


Or are we a community of competition with winners and losers?

Do we enjoy seeing people victimized while the elites get ahead at the expense of others?


Let us look at an example:

Aaandidark made Bloodflow (AKA Illi) co-leader of the guild Sentience.

Within a week – he kicked her out of the guild against her will, promising to return all her stuff, but failing to do so. He profited from the trust conferred upon him – and has aggrandized himself at the expense of others.


Do we applaud this shark-like behavior? Is it fun? Is this the culture we embrace?

Or do we deplore this behavior and suggest to Bloodflow that the least he can do is complete the return to Aaandidark all of the hundreds of items she put into the guild they built together.

Is Bloodflow a hero on the Oasis server?

Or is Bloodflow a thief?

Poll Question Close Date
Is Bloodflow a hero or a thief? Winner: "Bloodflow is dishonorable!" 4 weeks, 1676 days ago
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VOTE: Is Bloodflow a hero?
Poll Question Close Date
Is Bloodflow a hero or a thief? Winner: "Bloodflow is dishonorable!" 4 weeks, 1676 days ago
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